The Bully’s Playbook: Understanding the 5 Main Categories of Workplace Bullying Tactics
Bullies Will Use Anything—And They Don’t Stop Unless You Make Them
There’s no playbook bullies stick to. They’ll lie, manipulate, accuse, exclude, control, gaslight, or humiliate—whatever they think they can get away with. If they see a line and no one calls it out, they’ll cross it. And then cross it again.
I’ve seen it. I’ve lived it. And what I know for sure is this: it’s never just one tactic.
Most bullies use several at once—stacking them like weapons to do maximum damage. One day it’s sarcasm. The next it’s isolation. Then come the guilt trips, the emails behind your back, or the “just joking” insults in front of your boss.
The key to stopping it? Recognizing the tactics. Because once you can name what’s happening, you can take your power back.
Let’s break down the five major categories of bullying—and the specific tactics that fall under each one. You deserve to see them for what they are.
🗣️ 1. Verbal Bullying: Lies, Accusations, and Gaslighting
This is direct, personal, and designed to make you doubt your own mind.
Lying: Boldly distorting the truth to damage your credibility.
False Accusations: Blaming you for their mistakes or invented failures.
Gaslighting: Telling you that your reality is wrong. That you "misheard," "misremembered," or are "overreacting."
Projection: Accusing you of the very things they’re guilty of.
The Play: A manager looks you in the eye and claims you never turned in a report, dismissing your proof as an error. The goal is to make you question your sanity—so you become easier to bully.
😒 2. Nonverbal Bullying: Power Moves Without Words
This is the silent language of domination and exclusion.
Isolation and Exclusion: Being deliberately left out of meetings, emails, or conversations you need to do your job.
Divide and Conquer: Turning your teammates against you with whispers and lies.
Micromanagement: Asserting control by scrutinizing your every move.
Withholding Resources or Info: Setting you up to fail.
Intimidating Body Language: The stare-down, the eye-roll, the aggressive posture meant to silence you.
The Play: You're left off the invite for a project kickoff, then berated for not being prepared. It's a deliberate trap, and everyone in the room knows it. But willingly go along.
💔 3. Emotional Bullying: Manipulation, Guilt, and Power Games
This is where they weaponize your humanity against you.
Feigning Victimhood: When confronted, they cry and make you look like the aggressor.
Emotional Guilt Trips: "I guess I just can't count on anyone," after they gave you an impossible deadline.
Sabotage: Undermining your work or poisoning your reputation with leadership.
Deflection & Whataboutism: "Well, what about that time you..." to avoid accountability.
The Play: You address their disrespect. Suddenly, you're in HR for "creating a hostile environment" while they play the wounded hero. They manipulate the system to punish you for defending yourself.
💻 4. Cyberbullying: The Digital Dagger
Technology just gave them more tools and more audacity.
Demeaning emails CC’d to the entire chain.
"Accidentally" excluding you from crucial digital communications.
Using team chats to spread rumors or mock you passively.
Monitoring your digital activity to criticize every minute spent offline.
The Play: A brutal feedback email is sent to you and your boss. It's a public flogging disguised as professional development. The goal is to humiliate you under the guise of "helping," making it difficult to challenge without looking defensive. The button "CC All" is their amplifier, and your reputation is what gets damaged.
🥊 5. Physical and Boundary-Crossing Behavior
This is the escalation from psychological to physical intimidation.
Invading your personal space to assert dominance.
Hostile gestures: Slamming things, punching a desk.
Blocking your path or standing too close during a conversation.
The threatening stare meant to silence you in a meeting.
The Play: They stand over you while you're seated, getting in your face during a disagreement. It's not "assault," but it's a clear physical threat designed to make you back down.
Here’s the truth they don't want you to know.
This isn't a misunderstanding. It's a strategy.
Bullies use these tactics because they work. They will keep using whatever gets a reaction—or, more importantly, whatever goes unchallenged. They will mix and match these plays to keep you off-balance.
Gaslighting on Monday. Sabotage on Wednesday. Playing the victim on Friday.
So, What Now? You Have Two Choices.
You can keep trying to figure this out on your own, hoping they'll just stop. Or you can get an expert in your corner.
My coaching program is built for people who are ready to stop reacting and start making strategic moves that protect their peace, reputation, and future.
👉 Click here to work with me
