Stop Victim Blaming in the Workplace: Bullies Are the Problem

Last updated: June 2, 2025

I was recently talking with a mental health practitioner about my experiences with workplace bullying. I shared some deeply personal experiences, including how I often struggle to see the glass as half full.

Like many who experience bullying, I’ve learned the hard way that sharing your story comes with risk. It’s common to be met with doubt, dismissal, or even blame. But we still want to be heard. We want someone to understand what we've been through.

After opening up, the mental health professional asked me, “In what ways has your negative attitude contributed to your continued involvement in problematic work environments?”

This kind of response is far too common—and deeply damaging. Instead of validating the harm, it shifts the blame onto the person being harmed. This is victim blaming, and it has no place in any conversation about workplace bullying.

What Is Victim Blaming in the Workplace?

Victim blaming happens when someone suggests that the recipient of bullying caused or contributed to the abuse. It implies that personality, mindset, or behavior—not the bully or the system—are to blame.

This reframing is easier for others to accept than the truth: that bullying is often systemic, embedded in culture, and allowed to flourish because leadership enables it.

When we blame the recipient, we stop short of holding the organization accountable. We treat bullying as a personal issue rather than what it really is—a reflection of a broken workplace culture.

Bully Culture Is Systemic

In many workplaces, bullying is already baked into the culture. Norms, values, and expectations reinforce harmful behaviors. Workers are socialized into roles: bully, bystander, and recipient. The organization rewards those who comply and punishes those who resist.

The person being bullied isn't the cause—they're often hired into an abusive system. Once someone leaves the role of recipient, the system simply replaces them. It’s not about one bad hire. It’s about a culture that requires someone to be in that position, so the system can keep running.

When I accepted a position in higher education, I thought I was joining a faculty. I didn’t realize there was a second, unspoken job opening: the role of the next recipient. And as soon as I stepped in, I inherited the backlash that came with the role.

Some Fields Are More at Risk

Certain professions—like higher education, K-12 education, healthcare, law, and mental health—have higher rates of bullying. If you move from one abusive workplace to another within these sectors, it’s not because you’re the problem. It’s because bully culture is common and contagious.

This is what makes victim blaming so dangerous. Instead of exposing the root cause, it reinforces the system and silences the people harmed by it.

The Real Problem

It is exhausting to try to explain your experience to people who minimize it or blame you for it. But your experience matters. You should be taken seriously.

Workplace bullying is abuse. Period. And until we stop blaming the recipients and start changing the culture, we are part of the problem.

What You Can Do

If you work in HR, mental health, education, or management:

Stop blaming the recipient. Start fixing the culture. Learn what workplace bullying really is. Understand what it isn’t. Know the signs, and be the person who helps—not harms.